I am so grateful to have had a loving friend like you. You love me so unconditionally. You are my friend even in the afterlife. I see you blue Jay looking at me…
I remember the last day all so well. I turned the steering wheel to the right as I entered into the parking lot of the hospital where your body laid. I proceeded to enter onto what I would call “Holy grounds.” I walked with grace into the Emergency Room entrance, I proceeded down the hallway to the elevators of the main lobby. I remember standing in the lobby, while pressing the button to reach your room floor. But all the while standing in the elevator, my cell phone would strangely get a signal to ring, the work of thaumaturge. My cell phone is normally unlikely to get a reception in an elevator, or it loses its signal all together, but not on this day, June 3, 2016 which feels like only yesterday to me, your Spirit drifted away while I was standing in the elevator. Your Spirit felt my spiritual presence in the elevator of the hospital as you took your final breath. My soul honored your soul as your physical body laid in the hospital bed in a state of eternal rest. In that moment, you gave me confirmation that you knew I made it back as I promised to say goodbye in irenic. Then, you breathe your last breath.
All the while, I was assigned with the task by God to help others to process their own grief, pain and loss of their love ones. Only this time, it would be me standing in the very same position as many others I helped over the years to cope with the loss of their love ones in the here and now situation. I can attest, its very painful to lose a love one, someone you have loved day in and day out over the years, selflessly. However, preparing others as to how to cope with their love one’s transition to the afterlife is a spiritual work in progress. There’s never a day that goes by that you’re always in the cycle of helping others; learning to be their strength. So, they can lean on you to weep, and morn. A job that serves a great deed in my eyes, a great strength that surpasses all understanding.
The very day I promised to come back to release your Spirit with a proper goodbye before your body became increasingly weaker than the day before. As sure as my body was logy from a long day of hard work while reclining on my loveseat at home in my living room. Then, my cell phone would ring only to speak volumes to your final hours here on earth before you would take your last breath. Your Spirit visited my every heartbeat as I laid limp, but God’s love lifted me with compathy. So, I could travel that long road to the hospital to release your restless soul.
My dear friend, I remember promising you that I would be back to the hospital. As I lean closer to you while you drifted in and out of consciousness. I whispered in your ear in a soft-spoken voice, promising you that I would be back to the hospital to say my final goodbyes, just so I could hold onto your Spirit just a little while longer.
“This, then, is how you should pray:
“‘Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.”
Matthew 6:9-14 (NIV)
Somehow, I have learned to lean on my own strength now that you are in a better place, resting and smiling down on me from heaven. I remember laying my head down next to yours’ while you were in the hospital bed awaiting the days of your afterlife transition. The touch of your hand pressed up against my face was a sign to let me know you embraced my physical presence graciously. Then, you proceeded to put your arm around the back of my neck as my head laid next to yours with tears flowing down my face in a state of toska. So, I had to turn my face to the wall, just so you wouldn’t see the tears of sorrow rolling down my face. I will never forget the stillness of your body, as I watched your fainting heartbeat raise up and down during the midst of your shallow chest caving in with the victory of your heart stopping. All the while I knew it was just a matter of time you would be physically leaving me for the last time to go and be with the Heavenly Father.